P.S. “If I could go back in time…” is an article I initially wrote on LinkedIn and if you want to read the original post, click here.
Recently, I was part of a group of 50 students selected nationwide to participate in a weeklong program geared towards helping Black and Latinx Computer Science and Engineering students navigate their way and thrive in the technoverse (yeah I made that up – think technology and universe combined). Throughout the entire week, I had the opportunity to meet with various leaders in the tech industry, from recruiters to developers, engineers, managers, photographers, and insert-illustrious-profession-here…
Most of the people I interacted with seemed well-established in their careers and quite frankly, I got the impression that they had everything figured out, maybe almost everything. Being one currently on the college rollercoaster where grades fluctuate like stock exchange rates and where success is anything but permanent, I was curious to find out what these folks wish they had done earlier in their lives, years back as college students. For obvious reasons, I will not mention their names lest you start snooping around for what is not necessary and let your curiosity overshadow the three most important lessons I gained from these conversations:
On time management: Knowing how college is, it wasn’t surprising to find out that a good number of the folks I talked to actually struggled with time management as college students. Some wish they had known how to slow down and go with the tide. One individual I talked to said if they could go back to their college years, they would learn to not get overwhelmed with mounds of work, especially unncessary work. Knowing your priorities is not enough if you don’t know how to act on those priorities. I learned that it is important to not try to crawl, walk, and run at the same time. Bite what you can chew! Time management means knowing what to do, when to do it and get it done, how to do it efficiently, where to do it, with who, etc. It’s not just about setting a timer for 30 minutes of undistracted studying and resume after every 5 minutes of bliss and fun.
On learning: If you are expecting to find nuggets of wisdom on how to learn, I advice you to stop reading at the end of this sentence. Now that you are not expecting to be told how to learn, I will continue sharing what I learned, not tips on how you, dear reader, can learn. One engineer I talked to emphasized that learning is not as important as having the ability to learn. A circus lion can learn to do tricks, but can never ask questions or challenge its teacher. Having an ability to learn means having the temerity to not only ask questions, but to admit to not knowing. One professional said they’d rather have someone on their team who is motivated to learn than have one who is reluctant to learn.
On being uncomfortable: There’s this quote that I came across that pretty much summarizes all that I learned about daring to venture out of the norm and stepping into the storm, “There is no comfort in the growth zone and there is no growth in the comfort zone.” Most of the people I talked to attributed their current and past successes to pushing themselves and having friends and mentors who pushed them to do more than average. They didn’t find it fun walking the extra mile or even introducing themselves to strangers without feeling being judged. Because they did that, and oftentimes gained nothing but experience, they prospered. In the end, experience is what matters most.
So there, the ball is now in your court and I hope you will take something out of this and step out of your comfort zone, even if it means sharing this post (haha self-advertising), and grow your potential and abilities! If you have any thoughts and ideas on what you wish you’d done or what you would like to do if given a second or third chance, please share below or DM!
The winds of change are blowing across the globe. There is talk of climate change, political change, economy and social changes, and so much more. Change. Whether we are aware of it or not, whether we like it or not, whether we want it or not, change is happening. But that’s external change. What about the change that goes on in the inside? I think that change affects the external change most. Its like the Butterfly effect. One tiny change in emotion or personality or behavior can set in motion a massive movement, for good or worse. This is the Malvern’s theory. It’s yet to be proved because I just thought of it and I do not know whether it has been said before or not.
Change is necessary for growth. It is an opportunity to develop ourselves and be better than we were yesterday or in the past. If I take a stroll downtown and see an elderly person lying on a pavement with no place to go, no food, no any-of-those-comforts-we-have-but-rarely-think-of, and do not have a change of heart or thought on the homeless, how will I grow and learn to help those who might not have some of the privileges I have? Each person is privileged in some way, whether we know it or not, acknowledge it or not. Others are privileged by race, some by abilities, others by material possessions or even education.
When it comes to change, it really matters who I am or who you are because when it comes to change, it not affects me or the person next to me or even you, dear reader. Sometimes change is detrimental to growth too. If an educated or well-informed person chooses suddenly not to share what he/she knows, then ignorance will be our bane. If a government or ruling party changes legislation or any policy that affects the majority, then change will not be as beneficial as in other cases.
The main point is to check change as it happens to us or to our society, global or local, and try as hard as we can to make sure it’s supporting, not undermining, growth.
“We all grapple with balance in life. But perhaps the first step to achieving that balance is giving ourselves permission. Permission to breathe.” – Jane Miller
Time swings by so fast, like a pendulum. It seems life is always in motion. Constant motion. We are born, we grow, we live and then, then we die. Life goes on. But as long as there is life, there is no death.
Aboard the train to work, a friend and I were talking about how fast the summer has gone by, how much time we seemed to have in the beginning and how little time we have now until the end. My friend happens to be a rising senior in college. The excitement of having made it so far is strong, and so is the realization that after this race, a new one will begin and who knows how that will compare to the present? My friend dreads being lost in the motion of time, swinging from work to home and back, from eating to sleeping and back, and other repetitive stuff that personally not find appealing but necessary. Many people I know, including myself, live from the ‘To-Do List’ – always buried in a hive of activities. This is so especially in ‘developed‘ countries where everyday is a race against time… and money. From conferences to meetings and back again. If in college, from back-to-back classes to daily shifts at the cafeteria or wherever the workplace may be. To and from, the time bob swings. Before we know it, graduation is around the corner and we join the rest of the world in that continuum. We work and live to work. In our last moments, depending on how well and fully we lived, we wish we had more time to live again. That’s the sad reality and cruelty of running out of time.
As I look ahead to the future, all I can think of is what I want to do. I imagine getting that well-paying job, living in a posh suburb, having a family, and much more. I seldom look at the little things that swing along with the time bob. In the end, those little things will matter. Those little things like doing nothing, being happy for others and for myself, finding joy and helping others find joy. Those little things that we so often neglect because we are being carried away in a whirlwind of activities on a daily basis without even knowing it. It’s like being on a journey without a destination. The goal is to find balance in life. In the end, it’s not how long we lived but how well we lived.
There’s a time or moment when we just want to be who we are, do what we are used to, be with people we are familiar with, and so on. These are some of the dimensions of what’s called the comfort zone. I do not feel comfortable in any zone out of my comfort zone! But I recently learned that the space outside the comfort zone is called the growth zone and this comes from the quote:
“There is no growth in the comfort zone, and there is no comfort in the growth zone”
If you are constantly in your comfort zone, then perhaps you are not really maximizing your potential and paving way for growth. Going out of your comfort zone means challenging yourself to do better, to be better. Last semester, I took some intense classes and fell down several times along the way. Each time I got up, motivated to reach the finish line even on my knees. I talked to and became friends with folks I barely knew and still know nothing about save their first name.
Putting yourself in uncomfortable situations opens the way for growth. Your brain will not be stimulated if you are used to do the same thing over and over again, but becomes stronger and more active the moment you do something different or challenge yourself.
Used to sitting in the back of the room? Sit in the front or middle section.
Used to sit in the front or middle section? Sit in the back!
Shy? Talk about yourself to a new person.
Talkative? Listen more!
Math major? Take a painting class!
Art major? Take a math class.
If you ever feel uncomfortable, remember that that’s because you are in the growth zone where comfort is a luxury! Make the most of your talents and abilities, or rather discover them, by doing a different thing occasionally. #GrowthMindset
It has been a struggle the past few months (shucks!) to update my blog. It’s like I took a vacation from blogging, but a meaningful vacation as I spent most of my time surfing… surfing on the internet and reading other people’s blogs and articles. During my vacation, I had the perfect vantage to learn more about myself. I do not know about you, but I value self-knowledge. I came across a wonderful text on a blog written by my professor and I am glad I did. I will be writing a series of reflective posts on the matter of identity and how that ties with creating a positive (and/or negative) change in one’s life, family, community, town, province, country, continent, world, universe, and beyond. This is not an easy matter, therefore I kindly ask for your opinions as I progress through this series. Does it matter who I am to create or promote change?
Here goes the story:
His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from a nearby bog. He dropped his tools and ran to the bog. There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow and terrifying death.
The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman’s sparse surroundings. An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved. “I want to repay you,” said the nobleman. “You saved my son’s life.” “No, I can’t accept payment for what I did,” the Scottish farmer replied, waving off the offer. At that moment, the farmer’s own son came to the door of the family hovel.
“Is that your son?” the nobleman asked. “Yes,” the farmer replied proudly. “I’ll make you a deal. Let me provide him with the level of education my son will enjoy. If the lad is anything like his father, he’ll no doubt grow to be a man we both will be proud of.” And that he did.
Farmer Fleming’s son attended the very best schools and in time, he graduated from St. Mary’s Hospital Medical School in London, and went on to become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming, the discoverer of Penicillin.
Years afterward, the same nobleman’s son who was saved from the bog was stricken with pneumonia.
When it rains in the Death Valley or in the Atacama desert, two of the driest places on earth, life blossoms. When the conditions are right, miracles happen in these ‘dead’ places and flowers bloom and butterflies cut across the azure sky as if they are in a drunken stupor — crystal evidence that some of these places we consider dead are not as ‘dead’ as they seem. They are just dormant, waiting for the right conditions to come about in order to awaken from the deep slumber of infertility.
In my high school agriculture class many years ago, we were taught that plants are capable of growing and developing as long as the right conditions are made available to them. We all know through simple observation that this is true. We are part of this organic system where our growth and development is assured when the conditions are right and we are prepared to grow and let nature take its course. In Zimbabwe and other parts of the world, many who have flourished in their lives did so when the conditions that stimulate growth and expansion were made available to them. There are those who hailed from poverty-stricken regions but, inspired by the works and accomplishments of others, worked their way up to the top and some who did well when others availed opportunities for them.
There’s a saying that goes and I quote, ‘Opportunity dances with those who are already on the dance floor’ – the ones who are already in the mood and groove of things and not those who are sitting on the bench. The weather might not be perfect, the conditions might not be right, the music might be too low to dance to, but in all, one should always hold on to the potential to grow, for indeed one day the conditions will be right and all one has to do is grow.